Earn money, pay bills, repeat

With my honey on deployment, we have been able to stash a good chunk of change away into savings. But I've been doing it so intensely that I have actually had a moment or two where I find myself short before payday because I've hidden so much money away in an account that isn't very easy to get money out (by design of course).

It's not bad to save and its not bad to save for a rainy day, but I'm starting to wonder if I'm saving out of fear. Its like I'm scared of ever feeling out of control and having a bunch of money saved up lets me feel like I have some sense of control no matter what happens. But its getting to the point where it's almost a detriment because no matter how much I get saved, I could be doing more and I haven't really done enough. This isn't Dave Ramsey gazelle intensity, this is just nuts.

There - I said it. Now I can figure out how to balance things out for myself. Maybe I need a therapist more than a financial blog

There is a lot of stuff in my house. Way too much stuff. I'm not totally innocent in why we have so much clutter, but I would say atleast 75% of it is my husband's stuff and my son has learned the pack rat way of his daddy with a bedroom filled with more stuff than I can shake a stick at.

My son has custom made orthotics and when he had them made they gave us the molds and told us to hang on to them in a safe place. Unfortunately that safe place ended up being his bedroom. Now that he needs adjustments on his orthotics, we can't find the molds to save our lives. I pulled his room apart and nothing. I starting pulling other closets and places in the house I think they might be and nothing. Now our house is cluttered and it's all over the place instead of being confined to closets and such.

Insurance covered them the first time, but I doubt they will be as open to covering another $450 for them within a 6 month period.

It is so frustrating to know I will likely have to pay out of pocket to replace something I know we have, but I can't find. I've gone through the stages of money grief including denial, fear, anger and am coming to acceptance that I'm going to have to pay out of pocket for this because my son's health is worth it. Thus the cost of clutter

This week has been so crazy. My boss scared me last Monday when he said he wanted to talk to me. I was working from home that day and offered to call him, but he insisted that I need to come see him in his office first thing in the morning. All I could think was, "oh crap, what did I do now?". I had a really mediocre review and my mid year check in prior to that had been pretty bad. I have been waiting to see if he was going to lay me off.

Tuesday morning, I get off the bus and hustle over to his office as fast as I can. In a 5 minute span he gives me a promo, hands me a slip of paper that reflects my new payrate and runs out the door to a training. I'm in shock and manage a feeble thank you. My company started layoffs about a year and I've just been waiting for the other shoe to drop with him. I had been prepping for a month to ask him if I was up for a promotion, was expecting him to say no and then turning in my two-weeks notice shortly after.

Turns out that the pay raise went into effect a couple weeks ago and I already got a paycheck at my new payrate and didn't even notice. Go fig. It's a good thing, but I am still in a state of shock.

Let me start off saying that having separate accounts is not a bad thing. For many - it is a very good and workable solution. For my honey and I we have always gone the joint route and it has worked out well for us.

In planning for his deployment, we created a second account that is techincally joint as well, but it's really his account. We set it up joint so I could move money into it quickly if needed, but all and all I don't touch it or monitor it besides making sure it doesn't say zero or anything negative.

He got a chance to call me today and we talked about me moving some money into it soon. It kind of bums me out because it makes it feel even more real that he is gone. We've been married for over 14 years and we always keep our assets together. It just feels weird to have something this separate set up.

All in all I have nothing to complain about and am trying to make the best of it while we are apart, but it just still feels a little melancholy sometimes when I see our two separate accounts.

My neighbor called me the other day letting me now that she is embarking on a new venture and if I could be a practice customer for her with her and her trainer. I blindly agree, cause she is a great neighbor, it's the least I could do.

Turns out it was financial advising with the eventual selling of insurance, etc. The sell starts with giving people a financial analysis and showing some examples of people's financial situations and how they were able to improve them.

We talked a bit and it turns out my financial situation is better than their examples. Okay - in full disclosure - I have seen a financial advisor last summer and had a good idea on my finances so I didn't do the whole run down with them. But it felt really good that we are on track! They told me how I was not average and ahead of the curve, which I have to say, I enjoyed.

Knowing that my hubby was going to be deploying, we worked hard to get our financial house in order and it's nice to feel like we did a good job!

Man - I suck at keeping this blog up.

Since I last blogged, my honey left on a deployment leaving me at home with the 2 kidlets. We are surviving, but I have given myself a challenge to pass the time. We have a ton of food in this house. I'm not gonna lie. We like to cook and we like to eat and we like to buy food we think we will get around to cooking and eating. The result? We have a ton of stuff in the cabinets and freezer. I want to try to use it all before my honey comes back so we can start fresh when he comes back (and hopefully eat healthier).

I still buy some groceries, but I'm trying to really keep it in check to force me to use the stuff in the house. I expect we will have a few thanksgiving feasts through the year. I've started inviting friends to come over for dinner, not just for company but to help us eat some of this food.

I read an article once that a lot of families could live several months easily just eating the stuff that was in their house.

It takes more work to plan things out and defrost things in time, but I am bound and determined to save some money doing this!

So I recently took a road trip with my honey and my two kidlets. The youngest has a bunny blanket thing that she drags everywhere...and I mean everywhere. We caught on early how much she loved it and bought a back up bunny, but there is a certain sense of security in having two. Well, we dragged this bunny across 3 states and as we were on the home stretch of the drive home, we realized bunny got left in the bathroom of a fast food restaurant. It had been over an hour since driven off from the restaurant and were 60 miles north of it. I desperately called the restaurant and thankfully they had it. We sent down a prepaid envelope for them to mail it back and I'm calling them daily to make sure they have it and see when they send it.

This made me wonder, how could get another one of these bunnies? They were a toys r us exclusive and they no longer carry them (we look all the time). I found the bunny on ebay. One for $70 and another for $40. And this doesn't even include shipping! What if we only had 1 bunny and I left the sole lovey at the restaurant? Could I ever justify spending this much money on a lovey for my baby girl? Anyone else ever encounter such a dilemna?

Keep your fingers crossed that I can get bunny back soon!

I'm such a slacker! The quick update - I didn't get laid off (yet), I did pay off our remaining student loans, and we are anticipating a possible military deployment for my spouse this fall.

My mother was a military wife and when I told her about my husband going, the first thing she asked was, what are you going to do about your job? I don't get it. I'm going to go to work as usual and do it. I guess times have changed

Since we are anticipating this change in finances (it's not a done deal, but better safe than sorry), we have created a pretty good sized list including a bunch of home stuff that needed to be done. Turns out this home stuff adds up quick!! Going to try to capitalize on a work benefit for legal services and get the will updated.

Open to suggestions on other ways to prepare!

All in all, things could be much worse, so I am happy for what I've got!

So we wanted to take a vacation but Hawaii and Disneyland are out of the question right now as we try to build our emergency fun. We struck a middle ground and went to the Great Wolf Lodge. We got a good deal as a repeat guest and also going on a Thursday helped a lot.

At the Great Wolf Lodge, you can only live so long at the indoor waterpark so they offer other entertainment. There is this game called Magiquest that costs about $25 including a re-usable wand and a game that takes you several quests and adventures. We saw it during our first visit and couldn't justify the cost. But after my honey did research on it, he thought it would be fun for he and my son to do. I groaned a little but decided we do have the money so it will be fun for them.

We enter the Magiquest store and there is a magnetic pull on your wallet just walking in. It isn't enough to have a wand and the game. They have costumes, accessories and all sorts of extra stuff. The 2 groups in front of us spent over $80 per child in their party. I thought my financial heart was going to stop hearing that. I started to feel a tiny tinge of guilt that maybe I should buck up and let my son get an accessory (but I didn't say that outloud). At least I have the consolation that they loved it and I got to lounge around in the room while they ran floor to floor looking for clues.

All in all - we had a fun mini-vacation for under $300 for my honey and 2 kidlets. We stayed in the cheap no frills room, didn't eat in the hotel restaurants and didn't buy any trinkets besides the magiquest game.

On a totally unrelated note - I saw this video on msn (http://video.msn.com/video.aspx?vid=440c42de-45fb-4c12-a38e-1dc3c2814851) where this former exec who got laid off takes a job as a janitor to survive. I was pretty moved about his honesty and candor and how humble he was. I have thought about what it might feel like if/when I get laid off and this guy really sums it up beautifully. Highly recommend you watch it. There is a more expanded video of his situation somewhere (maybe the today show?) but all in all - this guy's video gives me strength in this crappy economy and helps me remember to pray everyday for all the blessings I have with my family and friends.

But the call for donuts was strong. Too strong. But they were delicious.

Tomorrow I am staying home with the kidlets becauase both daycare and school are closed. We have a children's museum membership we'll try to use and if the weather holds up we'll hit the local park.

Maybe I'll have a better chance for a NSD tomorrow.

I work at this big company that is pretty well known. They announced layoffs in this last week. They laid off 1400 in this last week with a plan to lay off 3600 in the next 18 months.

I didn't get cut this time around but people I know did. People I didn't think would be cut. Now I have to wonder if I'm next. I highly suspect that I may be on the chopping block in the next 6 months. I'm sure my friends think I'm just being paranoid, but always better safe than sorry. I was laid off once before with this company but was able to line something up, but the hiring landscape is so different, I don't know if I could squeak out of this one.

Based on this - I now officially revoke my previous goals. The goal now is to save save save in the emergency rainy day fund. I think it may get very stormy. I had a great goal to pay off my honey's student loan this year. That's off for now. The goal is to keep afloat and stash away money in case I get laid off.

Hopes and prayers go out to all who may be in a similar situation or who may have been laid off.

On a side note - I read Liz Weston's Easy Money. Good down to earth finance book! Reading Dave Ramsey's Total Money Makeover. Jury is still out on that book....

So I got an email from zillow yesterday happily informing me that my home value has decreased another $5,500. Geez - Happy New Year to you too!

I've heard a lot of people who don't feel that zillow is very accurate, but it's been pretty consistent for my home based on some other stuff I've looked at. I think was irks/bums me out more is that I live in an area where they main type of people are "stretching couples". These are couples who are characterized as high income, high-expense surburban couples. I am two out of three, not sure how good or bad that is.

For the month of December I was on vacation for the first week - stuck working from home for about 1.5 weeks due to bad weather/road conditions and then on vacation for almost 2 weeks, where I've been anti-productive. Monday will be a culture shock when I have to meet my vanpool at 7am!

So I was reading a community section on MSN money about what people's financial goals are for the next year. I wanted to start tossing around ideas for what I hope to accomplish.

I want to build a decent emergency fund. I can have a tendency to be a worry wart and I'm a bit concerned for my job, even though my honey thinks I'm just being paranoid. I'm in the staffing industry and my company isn't really hiring right now. So if you aren't hiring, and you have a bunch of recruiters who are sitting around, who is the first to get cut???..... (on a side note, I've been on vacation for a while for the holidays, but have plans to make myself useful once I get back in the office). Suze Orman says you should have 8 months in an emergency fund. So I've been building a spreadsheet to figure out the average of what I need per month including monthly, bi-monthy, quarterly bills. I set up formulas to calculate not only monthly, but overall annual costs as well. It was pretty shocking. When I showed my honey, he was pretty shocked. We had never looked at our money like that. I also calculated what we earn per year after taxes and suddenly we found ourselves asking where did the rest of the money go. Little depressing, but liberating as well. If I am following Suze, and goal myself for 6 months - I need to build another 16k. That is a lot of money. A more realistic number to shoot for is probably 8k, but hey - dream big.

I would love to pay off my honey's student loan. Looking rationally, I should pay off the HEL first as it has the highest interest rate of our debt, but the student loan is much smaller and I need the gratification of paying something off in order to keep going. Best financial strategy? Probably not. But debt paid off is debt paid off.

I would like to help my honey understand better that money doesn't grow on trees and we have to plan for some rough times as I don't feel 100% confident in my job. We went to Disneyland with our kids in Dec and talked about going in the spring for a parent getaway. He wants to go the end of January, but I'm not totally done paying off the last vacation. I'm hesitant to charge more, but he keeps saying, "well, we talked about it". I would like him to understand that what we talk about and the reality of our finances don't always mesh perfectly and sometimes we have to pass on things. Anyways, we want to plan another family trip in Nov 2009.

Last thing I would like to try to do in 2009 - simplify. Run more on the treadmill, get rid of more stuff out of the garage and house that we don't need. Lose the excess weight both off my body and out of my house. I want to be quick and nimble and it's hard to do that with a bunch of stuff dragging you down.

Phew - this entry lasted longer that I thought it would. Hope everyone has goals for the next year. Now we can take our new found financial planning powers and use them for awesome.

I've been reading other people's blogs for well over a year, but finally decided to get the courage to start one of my own.

I am very interested in personal finance, but don't find a lot of people I can just go on and on about it with, so figured, I can atleast write it out of my system on a regular basis.

We aren't broke, and make the bills and are saving some money, but I always feel broke. I like reading other's blogs cause then I don't feel like a freak looking for ways to get off the consumer treadmill.

This is going to be a long process for me to fill in all the blanks on my profile, so conider this entry my first baby step.